Staying Safe at Home
Preparing to Leave an Abuser
A checklist of items you may need when you leave
Staying in Your Home
At Work
Taking Care of Your Mental Health
Recommended readings
Staying Safe at Home
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If you find yourself engaged in a heated argument, try to move to any room with an exterior door. Some who feel threatened keep a purse and/or sack or small suitcase tucked behind a couch or in a closet close to the door. But if you have to leave quickly to ensure your safety, don’t stop for belongings.
- If you know your neighbor, tell him/her about your situation and ask that the police are called in case a disturbance is observed or heard.
- Make up a code word to use with selected people (children, family, friends) if you need help calling the police.
- Know ahead of time where you will go if you have to leave your home quickly.
- Trust your judgment and the assurance that you don’t deserve to be hit or threatened.
Preparing to Leave an Abuser
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Note that when a batterer suspects that the spouse is preparing to leave, it can become a very dangerous situation.
- Start thinking about what you will need to function independently and move forward opening a bank account, making copies of important documents, having credit in your name.
- Have access to extra sets of keys, clothes, a cell phone, some money, and the phone number and address of a shelter.
A checklist of items you may need when you leave:
- A form of identification
- Your driver’s license
- Birth certificates
- Money
- Bank account numbers and information
- Insurance papers
- Medications
- Address book
- Medical records
- Welfare identification
- Work permits
- Passport
- Lease or rental agreement
- Mortgage or deed
- Checkbook
- House/car keys
- Photographs
- Social security cards
- School records
- Green card
- Divorce papers
- Children’s small toys
- Military identification
Staying in Your Home
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Make your home as secure as possible – change the locks, place additional safety devices on windows and doors.
- Develop and memorize your safety plan and be sure your children know what to do in an emergency.
- Be sure your children’s day care or school or sitter knows who can pick them up.
- Tell neighbors that you are living alone now and ask for their help notifying the police under certain conditions.
At Work
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Tell a supervisor you trust of your situation.
- Provide your office building security officers with a picture of your batterer and a description of the vehicle.
- Park where there is good lighting and security.
- Have someone walk with you to your car and vary your routes going home.
Taking Care of Your Mental Health
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Talk with a professional or a good friend about your situation and ask for support.
- Communicate with your abuser only if absolutely necessary and in safe surroundings with others present.
- Identify your own needs and let others help you secure them.
- Attend a support group.
- Read books and articles that provide practical as well as emotional help.
How to Clear Your Internet History
Open Internet Explorer
At the top, on your toolbar, click Tools
A window will open, click Delete Browsing History
A window will open, click the History box
Click Delete at the bottom of the window
Go back to the toolbar, click Tools
A window will open, click Internet Options
A window will open, make sure you're on the General Tab
Click Delete Browsing History on Exit, click apply, click OK
Click Browsing History Settings
A window will open, at the bottom change the number of days to "0", click OK
Recommended readings:
www.tcfv.org
www.taasa.org
www.knowtheredflags.org
